thecrimsenletter | Truth Meme Runover

I guess it is kind of impossible to not worry about that. Yeah, so did my best friend's girlfriend. She was very...considerate? He was the one who set us up, so I think he understands? As much as anyone can understand crazy BDSM city?

Then it sounds like it wasn't as awkward as it could have been?

I know that's probably not much of a comfort now, but knowing we're all in a similar situation makes people tend to be a little more understanding of crazier circumstances.

I guess not. And I haven't really had much luck finding bisexual or lesbians to be with for the quota, so I'm glad she's willing to help. No, it actually is a comfort. Because so much of what's normal here is unheard of in my world. Or at the very least, kept behind closed doors. So I'm getting by as well as I can.

If anything supernatural exists in my world...well, we're having a hard enough time dealing with the "normal." Is it easier or harder that way? Knowing your path?

Edited 2020-06-03 23:34 (UTC)

It is not a fate I would wish on anyone.

In some ways, it is easier once you come around to accepting it. In other ways, it can be difficult, knowing you may not be able to change what's to come.

So does that mean that fate exists?

I believe that. But there are some who do not.

It's hard for me to let myself believe in it. Because if I do, it means that someone I knew from home was going to die, no matter what.

Death is its own inevitability.

And it's true that there are some forces in this world we cannot change.

But Hannah deserved better than that. She deserved better than what I gave her. I can't accept that she was meant to die, I just can't. There were so many times when I could have reached a hand out to take hers and everything would've been okay. Hannah Baker deserved better. And I denied it to her. Over and over and over again. And I'd give anything to take it back, take her hand and let her know that everything was going to be okay. If she just hung onto my hand.

There is only so much we can foresee or anticipate. Though I'm very sorry you've lost someone who you clearly held dear.

I'm certain your friend did not doubt your affection for her. Some things may not be stated aloud but it does not mean they are not received.

I did. I had such a crush on her and I ruined everything.

I know she did. She'd left something behind, explaining why she did what she did.
I was one of the reasons why.

[ from here ]

well, haven't you heard? being a nerd is totally cool now. teacher's pet is still one of those tricky ones, though. i guess it depends on the teacher. not that it matters much here what with the whole no school thing but still. there are definitely worst things to be.

Maybe places other than Liberty High. There, jock culture reigned supreme and I pretended to go along with it, but truthfully? I'd rather go to a dental cleaning than another high school sports game. Yeah, no school. Which is both a disappointment and a relief. I know. I just have to remind myself of that.

i guess my outlook on it is a little skewed because i went to a science/tech school, so. everybody was pretty damn nerdy. we had jocks, but it wasn't really like that. what's disappointing about it? genuinely asking my best friend was really into going to class, too

That's lucky. The jocks at Liberty could get away with just about anything. And I do mean anything. I miss going to classes. I miss my girlfriend. We'd only been together a little while, but I liked her a lot. And I was supposed to graduate in May and I was really looking forward to going to college.

ugh. ugh. that sucks. that's infuriating, yeah. i'm sorry you have to deal with that. it'll all still be there when you go back. you're not missing your graduation, and your girlfriend won't think you skipped town or something. which i know probably doesn't help for now, but hopefully it's a little less to worry about?

Yeah. One of them in particular. Bryce Walker. He grabbed my inner thigh and said that if I wore more revealing clothing, people wouldn't have thought I was such a lesbian. I'm cleaning up the language for your sake. It's a little less to worry about. But what do I do here? Now? I've been meeting the quota through my best friend's girlfriend, but she's a little young for my taste. Now what?

Edited 2020-06-14 17:21 (UTC)

jesus. what a dick :c wait if you're in high school how young is too young like how is that even possible wait, i don't want to know. god, this place is so fucked up. anyway. have you thought about job hunting? just to stay busy?

He was worse than that. Far worse. Yes. Yes, it is. I've considered it. I'd like to get a job with the government. That was what I was planning to study in college, political science. My dads are very liberal and VERY civic-minded. And I'd like to make a difference somehow.

the government here? i think you actually can a job working with the government, but i think it also involves like going all-in with the whole structure of this place the dom/sub thing enforcing quota stuff i mean, it's not as bad as trying to work for the security people here, but i don't know if i could stomach it.

Seriously? Damn. There go my plans of bucking the system from within. Because I think the system could use some rethinking. I don't think I could, either. I had enough of unfairness and people getting away with things they shouldn't, just because they were jocks. I'd go out of my mind trying to enforce the rules of this place.

Truth Meme Runover

for resistingly

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for transgressings

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(cw: suicide mention)

thanks for sending me the link!

sure, thanks for continuing! :)

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(cw: underage referenced)

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(cw: implied sexual assault)

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